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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28116132">[VLOG] so you found an assassin droid</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/loosingletters/pseuds/loosingletters'>loosingletters</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Background Noise of Defiance [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Droids, Fluff, Gen, Humor, One Shot, Planet Tatooine (Star Wars), Social Media, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000, be gay do crime</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:20:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,306</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28116132</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/loosingletters/pseuds/loosingletters</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Twin Suns @skyseekerpilot<br/>Can anybody tell me if it's illegal to own an HK-77 droid? Thanks :D</p><p>Still here @vicTORI-is-here<br/>What did you do????</p><p>Bigg Dreams @darkestlight<br/>More like what did he make me carry home</p><p>Luke Skywalker &amp; Biggs Darklighter, Tatooine's most successful influencers, are back with a new video!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Biggs Darklighter &amp; Luke Skywalker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Background Noise of Defiance [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1765165</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>86</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1266</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>[VLOG] so you found an assassin droid</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChaoticNeutral18/gifts">ChaoticNeutral18</a>, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writing_is_THORapy/gifts">Writing_is_THORapy</a>.</li>

        <li>
          Translation into Русский available: 
            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28756635">итак, вы нашли дроида-убийцу [Видеоблог]</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sangrill/pseuds/Sangrill">Sangrill</a>
        </li>


    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Happy Hanukkah you two!<br/>I hope you enjoy this story! :D</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Twin Suns @skyseekerpilot</em>
</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <span>Can anybody tell me if it's illegal to own an HK-77 droid? Thanks :D</span>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>
  <em>
    <span>Still here @vicTORI-is-here</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <span>What did you do????</span>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>
  <em>
    <span>Bigg Dreams @darkestlight</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <span>More like what did he make me carry home</span>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>
  <em>
    <span>Scrap Hunting @scraphunting</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <span>Scrap Hunting has uploaded a new video! Click <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snpS8Qa42nc">HERE</a> to watch it!</span>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>
  <em>
    <span>L31a @ThePrincessHerself</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <span>Omg new video???</span>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The video started with two boys sitting on a workbench, slowly drinking tea from two mismatched cups. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So," Luke spoke up, interrupting the silence. "I want to start this off by saying that I am absolutely innocent and have not broken any galactic laws."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Next to him, Biggs just looked up at the ceiling and pinched the bridge of his nose. "This is <em>Hutt</em> Space. What kriffing galactic laws?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, quicker than he could stop it, Luke dug his extremely sharp elbow into Biggs' side, causing him to yelp. Unbothered by his friend rubbing his side all while hissing, Luke continued speaking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Anyway! Welcome to a new episode of Scrap Hunting! We sure gained a lot of following since our last video, so we thought we'd do a bit of a different thing this time around?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke laughed nervously as white writing behind his dead proclaimed having gained thousands of followers and being just a little overwhelmed by it all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"A lot of you were interested in seeing where we get our materials and what our set up to the actual repairs is, so we figured it was time for a vlog?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A little helplessly, Luke looked at Biggs, but his friend only shrugged in turn. They weren't exactly sure whether it counted as a vlog, they had never really done it before.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"In any case! We brought you something special today, so feel free to follow the journey that led us to this. If you enjoy this format, be sure to tell us."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After these words, Luke leaned forward and picked something up that was out of the video frame. He sat up again and held something large and round and metal in his hands that, after taking a second look, revealed itself as a droid head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So here's the story of how we found an HK-77 droid, which we will now start repairing. Have fun!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biggs loved Luke; he really did. They had known each other their entire lives, but there was no doubting that his best friend was absolutely insane. From racing in Beggar's Canyon at a young age to breaking into a scrapyard in the middle of the night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We are so gonna get caught," Biggs hissed. Nervously, he looked around as Luke dug through the mountains of trash. He made sure to keep the recorder on Luke to catch it for their channel. If they were going to get arrested for this, it had to be worth it, at least.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Nope, it'll be just fine," Luke replied and triumphantly pulled something that used to be part of a hyperdrive out of the mountain. Immediately, waves of junk rolled down, clattering on the ground and causing much more noise than Biggs was comfortable with.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Are you sure?" he asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah, I can feel it," Luke replied absentmindedly as he inspected the hyperdrive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The video switched back to the workshop where the duo was reassembling the droid. "Fun fact," Biggs said, leaning over the half-assembled droid. "Luke spent too much time out in the sun as a toddler. When he tells you that he has a feeling? It's true 90% of the time."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then Biggs's eyes widened as if he had just had a realization, his head whipped into Luke's direction. "Do you think you could get me the lottery numbers?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke pulled his arm out of the droid's torso to stare blankly at Biggs. "Do I look like I can?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I don't know, <em>can</em> you?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke opened his mouth to reply, then he stopped and closed it again with a frown on his face. "I don't think so," he said slowly. "We should try it out."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The video froze momentarily as a text block appeared, reading: <em>It doesn't work</em>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"He can feel it, he says," Biggs muttered, kicking a rusty pipe. "This sounds insane, you know that, right?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Absolutely- hey! Look at that!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biggs turned the camera up towards the part of the trash heap Luke was pointing at there. There, in the middle of old ship parts, was a hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not that of a sentient, of course.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Looks like a droid," Biggs said, studying it with interest. "Do you think you can get it?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Obviously."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The video cut back to the workshop where Luke was welding the head of the droid back to its body, goggles hiding away his face. "I want it on record that I did, in fact, get the droid. It's here. On the table. It went successfully."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biggs just grinned and leaned back, arms crossed. "Do you guys want to know how many takes it took him? Twenty-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Don't you dare edit this in!" Luke protested, pointing tool threateningly at Biggs, but the other boy was entirely unbothered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take 1</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Right, I can just step in here-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could not.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take 2</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke was trying to climb up over what used to be the wings of a ship. He slipped.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take 3</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>From a different point than before, Luke attempted to jump up to the next platform.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He failed again.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take 10</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Just one more try. I swear I got it," Luke insisted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Uhu." Biggs only nodded and examined his nails. "Do you want me to grab it? I'm a bit taller than you."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Eat a bantha, Biggs."</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take 16</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Okay, so if I climb on your shoulders-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"And who is going to hold the camera?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"… Good point. This is why we need an assistant."</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Take 20</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke was half up the scrap hill when his right foot suddenly lost grip and he slipped again, catching himself only in the last minute and permanently scaring Biggs, who was holding the camera with shaky hands, for life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Okay, this is fine, he can do this. No need to worry. He'll get it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Thanks for the encouragement," Luke hissed as he pulled himself up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You're not the one who will have to explain to Beru Whitesun-Lars why her nephew looks like he was in a fight."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Slowly, Luke turned around just so that he could give Biggs a look. "My aunt has seen me in worse states."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Doesn't mean she isn't terrifying."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke couldn't disagree with that sentiment. "True."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Back in the workshop, Luke was setting aside schematics while miserably looking through his wire collection.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I hate you so much," Luke sighed and started connecting the droid's artificial nerves to one another.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Nope, you don't," Biggs said and set another cup of tea next to Luke. "Alright, what's the plan for this baby?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke grinned. "I'm glad you asked! Time for a little summary, I guess."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The video changed so that Luke and Biggs were still standing in the workshop, but the background had been edited to be a whiteboard. While the two teenagers in the frame continued working on the droid, and a voiceover of Luke's voice could be heard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Alright, so what Biggs and I found here is an HK-777 Assassin droid. This droid was developed by the Separatists towards… The end of the Clone Wars?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A little unsure, Luke looked over to Biggs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yep," Biggs agreed as on the white background the words <em>Clone Wars</em> appeared, and beneath that an image of the symbol of the CIS as well as the droid. "However, they haven't seen any real combat or at least much of it? They're being used by the Empire now."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The image of the CIS was crossed out and got replaced by that of the Galactic Empire.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Now, it's important to know that the HK-77 droids are generally considered to be the best of the HK-series ever developed by the Separatists," Luke said. "Obviously, I have opinions on that – but more on that later. Let's talk a bit more history first."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The image of the HK-77 droid shrunk as four more droid models showed up on the video. All of them looked similar to the HK-77 one, though by far not as elegant.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So, the HK-77 model was preceded by the HK-47, HK-57, HK-58, and HK-67 models. As you can see by the size comparison here, it's a bit shorter than the other models, allowing for greater maneuverability and being less noticeable."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At this comment, Biggs snorted. "It's still built like a kriffing tank, and from what I'm seeing here on the memory banks?" Biggs held up the datapad he was working on. Cables connected it to the droid's memory bank. "Uh, yeah, <em>not noticeable</em> was not it's preferred method. Assassin droid is obviously a misnomer. They should have called it trigger-happy bastard."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Don't be so mean to him," Luke said and gently pet the droid's detached arm. "Don't listen to him. He doesn't understand."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"He can't even <em>hear</em> me."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Be silent, heathen."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I got it!" Luke exclaimed and began to pull at the droid's body. Slowly, more and more of its body emerged until suddenly its whole frame fell out of the trash and Luke with it. Cursing, Biggs dropped the camera. After this, only a lot of clattering and shouting could be heard, no clear image being visible, only various dark splotches. The video only continued when Biggs went to pick up the camera. Some time must have passed as Luke was sitting on the ground, nursing his injuries while simultaneously examining the droid. "I think we found something good here."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah, can <em>something good</em> also walk on its own?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Doesn't look like it," Luke commented, poking the droid's joints, which promptly fell apart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Great," Biggs replied and ran his fingers through his hair. "Can <em>you</em> walk on your own?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah, think so." Experimentally, Luke stood up, wincing only slightly. "Okay, yes, I can walk, but you'll have to carry the droid."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biggs rolled his eyes exasperatedly, but you could tell that he was obviously relieved that Luke was well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"He did, in fact, make me carry the droid back home," Biggs stated, still examining the droid's coding. "Carry it to the speeder, go back for the other parts and then drive him and all his stuff home and unload it, and then drive back to my place and explain to my parents what I was doing at three in the morning."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now Luke actually looked a little guilty. "They didn't say anything-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No," Biggs shook his head. "I told them I was with you and they just sighed. Are the optical sensors working?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke took the droids sensors and connected them with what would be the eye sockets in humans. "It should now. Test it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Biggs typed something on his datapad, then nodded. "Yep, it's working. So, to continue our lesson: As you can see, the HK-77 has a narrow head and two optical sensors."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he said that, Luke pointed at the relevant parts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"First thing I'd improve if I were to build an assassin droid," Luke chimed in. "It's just impractical that it doesn't have 360° sight."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Wouldn't that lead to sensory overload?" Biggs questioned. "All these protocols, and jeez, I want to meet who wrote this because this code sure is something."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Maybe," Luke replied, deep in thought. "You'd have to make space for larger memory banks. I'm just saying, if I were to code a droid like this, it wouldn't be so bad."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not doubting that. But while we're already at it, Luke, you wanna handle the body parts?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sure!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke brushed his hands off on his pants, though that didn't make them any cleaner. "Alright, we already mentioned that the HK-77 was the Separatist's golden bantha. To continue, it came in two variants: assault droids and squad leaders. They look identical, but squad leaders are obviously more intelligent. What we have here-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Putting emphasis on the last word, Luke opened his arms wide, then gestured at the droid lying on the bench. "-is a squad leader! Which is great because that means he can be useful in the future and help us out in the workshop. It has blaster riffles integrated into its arms."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Here Luke lifted one arm up, shaking it slightly. "Though these aren't functional anymore. We'll replace those with proper hands and fire extinguishers. Next up, we will change the plating to be more heat resistant so that he'll actually be capable of helping out on the farm and in the workshop. We should add a smoldering iron as well. The overall cost of such a droid in peak condition is- "Luke stopped talking to look down on something. After a second look, he lifted a datapad close to his nose, where he frowned at the numbers. "Huh. That's a lot of cash. Maybe we should sell it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I think that's mostly because of the state secrets such droids can keep. They also work as bodyguards. But this droid's memory is fried, so it's useless. And if somebody left it on Tatooine, it probably can't be that valuable," Biggs intersected.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke nodded slowly. "True. In any case, this concludes our discussion of how the assassin droid works. Tune in next time to see how we actually overhaul it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"And done," Biggs breathed and dropped the droid in the back of the speeder. "Are you sure this will be worth it?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Absolutely," Luke replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'll be trusting you on this then, kid," Biggs replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The video turned black, then returned to the image of the empty workshop with white writing.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Like, subscribe, and comment!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>If you want to support us, feel free to leave a donation @scraphuntingofficial.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>X</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Scrap Hunting @scraphunting</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <span>Thanks for watching our newest video!</span>
  </p>
</blockquote><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading!<br/>I hope you enjoyed this story, I'd love to hear what you think!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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